4 years, 364 days

We didn't know if Jonah was going to be a boy or a girl before he was born, but I secretly wished that he would be a girl. I knew girls. I understood girls. Boys? I knew nothing. I wanted Anna to have the sister that I never got but always wished for. After 18 hours of slooooow labor and a speedster entrance, I didn't care what version came out. Right from the start he befuddled me. He was the boy that I didn't know anything about, and he had the whitest hair and bluest eyes. I would hold him and wonder if he was really mine. Had it been a mistake? This little boy has given me unbelievable joy over the past five years. He certainly beats to his own drum, but what a drum! He is all boy - physical, loud, constant motion - with the most loving, tender heart. He walks by Sarah and stops to give her hugs and kisses. He walks by Eli and grins as an invitation for wrestling. He routinely sacrifices his own pleasure for his siblings, and he has a strict code of fairness and personal dignity. He is intense whether he's wrestling, coloring a picture, pounding nails, or smelling flowers. He feels, sees, smells, tastes, and hears things that the rest of us would never notice. And you know what? He still befuddles me.